《我今年,二十七八岁》

深吸一口气。。继续向前走。。
烦恼的时候，不再发牢骚。。
我们静静的地，静静的地看着听着。。

这很现实又很虚伪的世界。。

明明很想哭。。
却还在笑

明明很在乎。。
却装作无所谓

明明很想留下，
却坚定的说要离开。。

明明很痛苦，
却偏偏说自己很幸福。。

明明忘不掉，
却说已经忘了。。

明明放不下，
却说她是她，我是我。。

明明舍不得，
却说我已经受够了。。

明明说的是违心的假话，
却说那是自己的真心话。。

明明眼泪都要溢出眼眶，
却高昂着头。。

明明已经无法挽回，
却依旧执著着。。

明明知道自己很受伤，
却说你不必觉得欠我的。。

明明伪装的好累，
却还得依旧。。

sorry that i loved you~

For all of the time that i tried for your smile
For making you thing that i was worth the while
So your love love love love love would be mine
For sending your flowers and holding your hand
That no one was there to take u stand
But then love love love made us blind
And I'm so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I'm sorry that it came true
But sorry dosent can turn back time
For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right
So sorry that i loved you
Sorry that i needed you
Sorry that i held you tight
And I'm So sorry for
Making you love me and saying goodbye
For being the one that taught you how to cry
It was love love love and it passed us by
For given you every thing that you dreamed
For taking it back when i fled the scene
sorry love for wasting your time
And I'm so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I'm sorry that it came true
But sorry dosent can turn back time
For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right
So sorry that i loved you
Sorry that i needed you
Sorry that i held you tight
And apology now after all of this time
Won't make my difference tonight
But I'm hoping I'm Sorry will open your mind
To love love love love in your life
yeah
Sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I'm sorry that it came true
But sorry do can't turn back time
For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right
Sorry That I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I'm sorry that it came true
sorry dosent can turn back time
im So sorry that i loved you
im Sorry That I hurt you
im So sorry that i loved you
im so Sorry That I hurt you
im So sorry that i loved you

sorry that if i hurted u...

Just to share some thought~

when i think of cell division within living things...i get something...quite similar to how we start to do a things...it start with 1 to 2...2 to 4.....but after some time...100000 to 200000......means the starting is slow and difficult...but it gets easier and easier after move onward~

Tests finally come to the end...for this instant only...

Finally it gone...but another it...and a lots of another it...will follow on to come...
I can feel tiredness of my body this few month...both physically and mentally is totally strained...
I can finally get my stress released and use this free time i get to recover my energy meter...
The result aren't good...
But teacher say it had improved...
But I can see teacher are trying to boast our confident...
Being a form 6 student in a school with previous amazing result of top five in Sabah...
No one of us feel funny about it...
Having a burden of this amazing result...i almost cant breath...
I'm hoping everyday everything could be change...
But what i get is...disappointing...

陈奕迅：全世界失眠

想起我不完美，
你会不会逃离我生命的范围。
想着你的滋味，
我会不会把这个枕头变得甜美。
想起白天的约会，
忘了晚上的咖啡。
只怕感情如潮水，
远离我梦中的堡垒。

一个人失眠，全世界失眠。
无辜的街灯，守候明天。
幸福的失眠，
只是因为害怕闭上眼，
如何想你想到六点？
如何爱你爱到终点？

想起我的时候，
你会不会好像我一样不能睡。
想像你的暧昧，
我会不会数不到绵羊一双一对。
想起白天的约会，
忘了晚上的咖啡。
只怕感情如潮水，
远离我梦中的堡垒。

一个人失眠，全世界失眠。
无辜的街灯，守候明天。
幸福的失眠，
只是因为害怕闭上眼，
如何想你想到六点？
一个人失眠，全世界失眠。
幸福的失眠，
只是因为害怕闭上眼，
如何想你想到六点？
如何爱你爱到终点？
如何爱你爱到终点？


听这首歌，觉得很感触~

Craig David - Unbelievable Album: The Story Goes

Always said
I would know where to find love
Always thought
I' d be ready and strong enough
But sometimes
I just felt I could give up
But you came
And you changed my whole world now
I' m somewhere
I' ve never been before
Now I see
What love means
It' s so unbelievable
And I don' t wanna let it go
It' s something so beautiful
Flowing down like a waterfall
I feel like you' ve been
Forever a part of me
And it' s so unbelievable
To finally be in love
Somewhere I never thought I' d be
In my heart in my head
It' s so clear now
Hold my hand
You' ve got nothing to fear now
I was lost
And you rescued me somehow
I' m alive
I' m in love you complete me
And I' ve never been here before
Now I see
What love means
It' s so unbelievable
And I don' t wanna let it go
It' s something so beautiful
Flowing down like a waterfall
I feel like you' ve been
Forever a part of me
And it' s so unbelievable
To finally be in love
Somewhere I never thought I' d be
When I think of what I have
And this chance I nearly lost
I can' t help but breakdown
And cry
Oh yeah
Break down and cry
Oh, oh yeah
It' s so unbelievable
And I don' t wanna let it go
It' s something so beautiful
Flowing down like a waterfall
I feel like you' ve been
Forever a part of me
And it' s so unbelievable
To finally be in love
Somewhere I never thought I' d be
Now I see
What love means

理智总是在和勇气争执。

有人说思维是抓不到摸不到的东西， 需要用心深入感觉才能看清真相~
虽说如此，有些人连自己的情绪。。思虑。。想法。。甚至感情也无法摸清，更别说别人的~

~想法太乱，幻觉太多~
~疑虑很大 直到说不清楚~
~心算太慢 但仍然算错~
~找对人 偏错过~

这是在一首歌里的~
细心想想，里面给了我不少的启发~
或许我真的是想太多了~
搞得自己情绪也很乱~
常常举棋不定~
不知是不是人长大了，就要被越来越多的东西捆绑着~
对一些事情。。理智总是在和勇气争执。。

某些事，自己很不明白~
但却不知道是自己不明白还是自己不太想去明白~
被困扰的自己觉得好想透一透气~
罢了。。 不想再想了，活好现在就好了~
We do all our part of job...and left the remaining part to the god...
Tired...

Recently what about me...

When heard a song that fit your feelings and emotions, it really get u very touched...
Touch not because that the song is really that nice, but you feel like somebody is understand you...

Recently i'm getting emotional, and hard to get myself concentrate on my study...
I understand what should and shouldn't i do now but i just can't control myself...
Somebody tell me that it is mood swing, and tell me how to handle it...
I'm trying to cope it but it seem to be getting worst...
I feel like i can't handle it anymore, i feel like if i could just leave all the things down and walk away...
I know i can't do that, because i know that our life is not just ourselve alone...
What you choose to do, affect the most the one most near to you...

Come to today, i suddenly feel like get lost...
I'm not that confident anymore...
Think more complicated...
Getting myself trapped in those "should and shouldn't do"...
Getting unhappy...
Getting good in act out a fake emotion of myself...
Feel like that isn't the real me...
Feel like Intellect are fighting inside with my Brave...

But the things that i should appreciate is a group of best friend...
And someone...thanks for your support...
After i write out all of this...
I hope i can really get myself released...
I shouldn't be like this anymore...
Be cheerful...to all of you include myself...

Nothing can stop you from chasing your dream~

When we want to further going for certain things that we hope to achieve...
It seem to be a lot of difficulty can appear...

But as i can say is...
There are nothing harder than you yourself to get control of your heart...

Get control of your heart not as easy as control your computer within a single click...
But u need to against everything that is so attractive in this colorful world...

Myself was trying hard to practice this stuff...
But this is not easy as i have said...

So i should start this by achieve some easier goal...
To build up my stamina and confidence...

Recently i have started to work out about 1 hour and revise my thick and dusty books for about 2 hours everyday...
I will keep this on...and even add some new goal as i success this...

GET CONTROL YOUR HEART...NOTHING CANT STOP YOU FROM CHASING YOUR DREAM~

Life such a glowing circle....

Imagine that your life are one circle...
Your circle is glowing larger and larger as time passed~

As your circle become large, you will intersect with many others circles that pass by your circle...
Some are simply touch your circle...while some are really strongly attached to your circle...
Who are some strangers...some classmate...
some friends...some truth friends...that u might meet...
When you intersect with each other...love and caring is shared...

And sure there will be some circle that might go into your circle...
You will surrounded it will your whole circle...
Keep he/she in your protection...and you are willing to do every thing for him/her...

While the circle inside you, he/she give his/her life to you...
He/she put all his/her belief on you...
Where her/his life become apart of yours...while your life are also apart of her/his life
When you are together...love and caring is shared to each other...
One of you become supportive of each other...
Therefore life become happier...easier...lovelier...

If one day...
Two of you wont be together anymore...
Each of the circle will leaving from each other...

Therefore a hole will leave inside each other circle...
The hole will either small or big depends on the time you two living together...
And it will become a black spot that never get rid of your life...

Life is simply sharing and caring with each other...
Appreciate who beside you...



Sorry for any grammar mistake...thanks for reading...hope you can understand what i'm saying...

Pre-U Life...

Time for this post is stolen from my revision time, i really run out of mood to study.
Time past by so fast, here come to my second semester already...

In my opinion that, pre-u not only studying knowledge, but it train us to open our mind.
Change the way how we thinking, acting and making decision...
Its just my own opinion...

Pre-u life come with alot of hardship...but i din feel hard under accompany of my best friend...
we sharing nonsense joke together.... laugh together.... carry out school project together...
life so complicated but we make it simple...

arh...so long i had used on this post...
I will try to stealing time for new post again.

Suddenly this come into my mind...

Since long time i had not come to my blog...then now is the time for me to clear up the spider web on my blog...

Recently i'm so bored...while i'm sitting on the sofa and do nothing, suddenly I had this thought...

This is what i would like to share...a meaningful story...

I realised I forgot to live

First I was dying to finish high school and start college.

And then I was dying to finish college and start working.

Then I was dying to marry and have children.

And then I was dying for my children to grow old enough so I could go back to work.

But then I was dying to retire.

And now, I am dying . . . And suddenly I realized I forgot to live.'

Now...
we are still young...
Don't let this happen to you.
Appreciate your present situation.
Enjoy each day!

New Form 6 system??? Pre-U?

Long time no post already...
Because recently my home no line...my first test also taking place...
Busy? or lazzy?
Both a bit a bit la...i think i will be more busy soon...because we will start new system soon...
maybe next thursday...

According to our teacher we are first batch of student doing this...all stpm student in malaysia also same...we need to stay at school until 3pm every monday till thursday...
where our schedule are...

monday- Pre-U society activity
tuesday- Researh & development
wednesday- Cocurriculum
thursday- presentation about our R&D
friday- back home as usual at 11.30am

I had heard from other friends which study univercity & college...they need to do presentation also...we are now more or less same to them...most of school's activity will also be organised by us...which are take over from our senior...and they also give us a lot of guide...hence, each of thirdteen of us will be responsible for sudden thing...

So, the conclusion is we not only need to be good in academic but also need to be active in our cocurriculum...Fung...big probability that we will have no time for dota soon...isn't it? I think we also not enough time for doing homework...early time i thinking of whether need to find tuisyen teacher for our physic and chemistry...maybe i need to rethink for it...

My first test had passed...some of the subject already marked...but the result...still ok...five subject i pass my maths, physics,pengajian am...but fail on my chemistry...with 47 marks...muet haven't mark yet...wish can pass it...no more idea...so i ended here...good luck my friend...

I think i should say something about our orientation...did i?

Actually the first image of the orientation for me is not bad...
I first heard about it was two week after i started school...
They(seniors) come into our class on that day....and give one of us a piece of paper...a paper pocket...inside it are those name of the seniors which cut into pieces and mixed...
and the purpose of that pieces of paper is for us to put the words that we had arranged into their name...besides that, there is also a list of nick name of the teacher and seniors on that paper...they ask us to take signatures according to that nick name...u guys guess did we do it? haha...no at all...but it havent over yet...

After two week...which is after our mid year holiday...they come again to our class...they said...wednesday we will having our orientation(today is monday)...our class will be form into 4 group...each group nid to present something on to stage...refer to the title given...haha...but once again we didnt do any thing...bcoz our sin kar class monitor said no nid do...

So come to wednesday...they come to our class to ask weather we had prepare or not...haha..our answer make them so disappoint...later, we begin order to put on a big manila card with our name ...really look like a Tai Ngong...but finally we put it on also...because begin scored by teacher...lolz...after the end of school...they tell us that activity(present on stage) had canceled...since none of us prepare it...they just request us stay at school to join some game they had prepared...and we thought that they are so good...so we stay at school finally...

After our meal...we all went to the seniors class...with a bit nervous...they all look like "senyum senyum kambing"...bad feeling in my heart...not feeling only...thats real...one of the girl take out a bottle like fabris...and started to spray water on us...do we look like flower???...she said that our name on the manila card is too small...nid to be larger...water spraying was none stop as we rewrite our name...after tat we strt playing game the had prepared by them...i also dunno how to describe those game...like kindergarden's game...we begin punish to dance la...sing la...when we lose...

That is the indoor game parts...got out door games?? right...
Remember that i said to get the signature part not yet over...lolz...they said as punishment...we all tired all our hands...sm?? nonono...just begin fooled only...we walk all around the tiong hua building...yup...with hand tired...and all the student are in school that time...all form 4/5 students looks into us like think..."why got sot sot ppl de???" we begin forced to walk...not time to think have face or not...on the way we walk...i discover that my trouser are wet...hah??did i peeing??...i look backward and discover that a male senior was take a water bottle to pour water on others trouser...is tat so funny???how old they are???...mao lit...

Finish?? not yet...we ask to continue playing check point game(to continue begin fooled)...one of the activity is...we given a pot of water...inside it are 1 sen and 5 sen...we gonna take up a 5sen with eye closed..and another partner tell us which one is it...but time given are too short...of course we cant do it..then punishment again...we asked to dance and sing in front of the toilet...which is the parking place...many student are all watching at us...really xiao za bo they are...after that the worse part i think is the questioning part also...punishment will be draw byMARKER PEN...i really dislike that part...u guys know...i still need to take bus ler...so i quit on that part...take my bag and gone...like Fung...

Some people said that Tiong Hua students study in others school will be treated more worst...because the teacher are dont like them...wait to discover from other friends...
The End...thanks for reading...

Recall the memories last time i use Jaring...

Recently our line are so bad...i wonder how they call it as streamyx...
This few day the line are not down anymore...because all my modem bulb are light up...
But i really shocked when i trying to download thing....
The speed of download is only 2.5kb/s...2.5kb/s!!! It more worse than last time i use Jaring...the highest also not reach 5.0kb/s...feel disappointed with our city...

Not even cant play online game...but i even need to press publish post for a few time for posting...
I didn't feel angry...but only very disappointed...
No water...no current...and also no internet now...
When will it gonna to change???
2020...2030...or 2040...
Hope it really changed in one day of the future...

Freedom!!! I want freedom!!!

Don't know today is what bad day...
Today is Sunday...
Of course my father no need to work...
That is no problem initially...
But don't know why...
Today he got no activity...
No friend find him...
No mahjong play...
Than that is the problem!
Firstly he reading news...
After awhile...
Suddenly that he look at me so serius...
That time i'm playing dota with friend...
Then he straight away scold at me...
He ask me why play game that often...(i think...holiday ma of course play la...)
Nevermine...i just follow his order and i close the game liao...
Since can't play game then i watch pps movie la...(i think it will be ok gua...)
Who know once again he stand behind me...
Then he ask me why still "playing" the computer...(i didnt play ar...i watch movie only...)
I try explain to him...but i know none of my word will he heard...
I surrender!!!
I shut down the pc...
And i just sit down on sofa whole afternoon...nyiak sai...
(I need freedom!!!)
Not me only...
My brothers also facing same problem...cant do that la...cant do this...
Until evening...
He answered a call...after that he take the car key and go liao...
Finally can open pc liao...haha...haha...hahaha...
Extremely happy...

Holiday??? I dont think so......

Any news from me? How to said... i not even know the life i had now is suitable for me or not... sometime i feel like i can handle... but sometime didn't... four words can said "pull cow up tree"... haha... already started school three week... but i still cant really concentrate more than 50% on my study...shame isn't it?... it is just starter... which mean there is still a long way for me to go... anyway... i have no choice but to continue... wish i can really get on to my study...

After tomorrow our school have holiday... for two week... isn't it good? I thought that i can really get relax during this two weeks... but my teacher had break my dream... don't forget that our teacher are so smart... they won't be that stupid to let us lazy for two weeks... of course what they do is... give present to us..."HOMEWORK"... one teacher give a few... then when they come together it will be....................... a lot......................... haiz... headache... really wish to get back to our form 5/4 life... i think this also wishes of other friends... but whatever we must always look forward... 分离是为了，将来的重缝... so we now eat some bitterness first, then we will have sweetness in the furture... this is the way i cheer up myself... wish you guys think like too... no matter we happy or sad... our life is still running... better we choose to carry out our life happyly isn't it?

Mystery picture...it give 3d effect!!!

Nowadays there is a lot of picture that give optical illusion had been discovered...

Like this...

Original Crooked Cafe Wall Are the UTE Letters Straight? Bent Lines Optical Illusion Wobly Lines Optical Illusion Another Cafe Optical Illusion Oblique Drawing Optical Illusion

Bent Aluminum Optical Illusion Crooked Skyscraper Optical Illusion Circle and Squares Optical Illusion Bent Ceiling Optical Illusion Straight or Curved Illusion Engine Room Optical Illusion

Other than that, there are somethings call "3D hidden image" this is what i want to mention about...may be some u already hearded about it..but i just want share it...
There is some method to see it...normal vision cant see the effect...

Here is it...

This is our normal vision...

This is the first method...i recommend this...

This is the second method...not recommend...because will cause your eyes to move to the middle...

Everybody is able to see...of course, you may need some training...especially PATIENT to see it...
Here is some of example you can train yourself...

There is a 3D apple in the middle...


A 3D window's logo is in the middle...


There is a 3D clock in the middle...


Some of the coins look like out from the picture...


A sun glasses is in the middle...


Every things look 3D and out from the picture...


A 3D lighter is in the middle...


A 3D 8 number ball is in the middle...


Every things look 3D...


A big 3D "YES!" word is in middle...


A 3D fly is in the middle...


A 3D perfume bottle is in the middle...

Its real...i didn't cheat u...just need to be patient...i believe you can see it...
Tell me if you can see it...

First day of writing...

Be a stpm student really not an easy... you think there is only five subject are easy things ahh! if i throw the five subject's... stupid... thick... book to u guys... i think u might badly injured... haiz... i feel headache every time i look into book... dont know how to pass this two year... luckyly all the classmate are my old friend... so... no lonely or boring feeling... this can be say like falling an orange and get an apple back... haha... dont know what english just now i typing... better workhard on my english or else i will died on my muet...